Looks like we made it.....

Eastern standard time has past, LOL@central time, and god knows I won't make it to pacific standard, sweaty, yawn, ugh. I have this impending sense of doom today, let's call it media rash, the first symptom after the initial elevation to orange alert....or it could be fever, who can say? That aside, I'm off to bed, let's pray that Vegas is still there when I wake up, if it's not, I'll be so very pissed, thanks and Happy New Year!

5

1. What was your biggest accomplishment this year? Breathing has been the major accomplishment with becoming a redhead again a close 2nd. It's been a rough year physically, and some people just weren't meant to be blonde, ever.

2. What was your biggest disappointment? The loss of my friend and employee Monica, I'm still not quite over her absence and frequently visit her in my mind. I pray good health to all I know and love and may the forthcoming new year bring few losses if any.

3. What do you hope the new year brings? Good fortune, any fortune, Love, Happiness and an organized closet.

4. Will you be making any New Year's resolutions? If yes, what will they be? I will make resolutions daily, what they will be will strongly depend on that time of the month.

5. What are your plans for New Year's Eve? Was going to Pie's, now going to bed, to the toilet, to the bed, toilet, bed, ugh. :S

Happy New Year, Ugh

Fever, aches, um....fever, um.....chills and very frequent trips to the porcelain god. I got "it", I passed out at work yesterday because of "it". My co-worker horked out his lungs, I kept it all in for as long as I could until I started ramblin' "not at work"....and....*splat*......virus? food poisoning? can't say except that pepto bismol & gingerale are my friends. Things could be worse, like my back going out again that would suck ass, or say this could happen and if I don't give tough love to the book collection it will happen to me someday as well, oy. So as I kiss off this freaky and bizarre year I do so with my blankey and my toilet and anticipate that 2004 will fair better and so will I. Sweet Mary mudda of Hey Soos.

Saddamity writes a book

"When Ezekiel convinces his Roman allies (read: the American empire) to attack Iraq, a resistance fighter named Salim (read: Saddam) drives them out in an apocalyptic battle on the Mesopotamian plains. President Bush might be interested in what transpires next.

Upon returning home, according to an excerpt from the book that appeared recently in Britain's Daily Telegraph, the Roman king discovers the twin towers of his capital city in flames. "The Romans watched the blaze and wondered who had done it," writes Saddam. "The king said: `Our enemies are great in numbers.' Ezekiel Hescel answered no. `Such a fedayeen attack could only be carried out by the Arabs."'

Gosh golly, it's good to see the ol' bastard used his time in the box creatively. =P

Link via Book Slut

One ring to rule them all

So, umm.....I'm thinking President Bush thinks he has 'the' ring. I could be wrong, but after the infamous Mommar Kadafi condemned and relinquished his country's WOMD, I got of visual of our fearless leader smiling that twisted cocksure smile he gives when he thinks he's been witty and then I imagined he got a happy "daddy look at me now" boner and then whilst thinking about his recent conquests he slowly twists his high school class ring for luck. It's just a thought, I was bored, idle minds yanno, carry on.

Blame Canada, Moo, eh

When the lights went out in the northeast this past summer we blamed Canada. That didn't quite pan out as it was our own aging power grid, whoopsie. Although Canada is telling us to chill out and that the paperwork doesn't mesh it's most likely the Mad Cow came from up yonder, eh. Most likely the cow became infected by eating his 3rd cousin twice removed as he was recycled into Moo Meal. We now have agricultural laws that make it illegal for the Dairy fella's to add dead cow to moo meal. It's just not right to eat your own kind unless of course it's for pleasure, um......or something like that, anyhoo, if you apply the simple rule "you are what you eat" in your life, you should be safe, I for one taste like chocolate, salsa & corn chips, yum and hey don't forget to blame Canada!

World Idol, I was just flippin' the channels, honestly ;)

On my return home Christmas evening I gave the remote control a workout, tired and quite content with all my lovely gifts and quality time spent with my family, I relaxed with the idiot box and ended up watching a chunk of the World Idol. As if the inundation of Kelly Clarkson and the twins, Clay Aikens & Reuban Studdard weren't shoved in our faces enough, let's just shove a wee bit more at em' and see if they get ratings, I'm sure they did. What I saw was for the most part unimpressive and Kelly C did a fine job and set the standard (American's can't vote for Ms. Clarkson), the young lady representing the Arab nations did a traditional "Arab" song, and my only thought was, those people need western culture and bad, oy. Thinking that K.C. had it in the bag, I continued giving the remote it's workout and eventually landed back on Fox in time to see the last contestant, a young chunky and not so pretty fellow from Norway named Kurt, his song: A Beautiful Day by U2, I love the song so I listened and that ugly lil fucker sang his heart out, gorgeous voice, great control, I got chills at the powerful presentation, those gnarly teeth were scary but God gave that ugly lil Norwegian a gift and as it stands now, he's my pick. Sorry Ms. Clarkson, we've got a lot of trilling diva's to keep us supplied for generations to come, but the raw, emotional beauty of Kurt's performance may win him this Idol crown. Me...sucker....entertain me and I'm yours. Woo!

Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanza and Chappy Channukah!

I'm off to the hideous hell that is the mall. I'm looking forward to seeing all the men frantically shopping and I can't wait to get my first pissy customer, I've reloaded the Bitchslapper 2000 with fresh batteries, so um.....beware and Merry Fucking Christmas!

PS: Happy Holidays to my elusive Kiwi friends, since I don't have a current email for your sorry asses and the Gwenners has been awol since January, Merry Christmas & happy fucking New Years Cuntessa, Mikehole, Eyes Spawn & Gwen! :oP~ *cheers*

I'm mad, your mad, we're all mad!!!!!

We have the distinctive honor here in Washington of bringing Americans not only an abundance of serial killers and dead rock stars, but now we give you the first stateside MAD Cow disease! Nothing like starting international pandimodium. Good Times!

Nothing Rhymes with Orange and Other Tales

Security Level: Orange with yellowish tint, wear a complimentary shade of blue.
Mood: Exhausted, thanks to the not-so-reliable employee who called in sick this weekend causing me to work extended shifts and beg other employee's to put off their own holiday festivities to cover the overlong Holiday Mall hours. That employee better have lost a fucking lung or something because I am NOT feeling the love, nope........arrrrrgh.
Christmas Cheer Status:Bah!! This is my last day off until Christmas Day and I've got a gazillion things to do, starting first with the evil exercise ritual that the Physical Therapist loves to torture me with, then wrapping and then some baking and then pass out.
Christmas Card Status:Um....Merry Christmas. :oP~

I'm in the Christmas Spirit today and he likes it.

I'm doing the baking thing today, and the wrapping thing today. I used to love to wrap gorgeous packages, but I would always feel so destroyed as the "unwrapper" tore at the thoughtful job. Now your lucky if I use tape! A beautiful wrapping job is for yourself alone, the recipient of the gift might think: "Lovely package, riiiiiiiip" and your thinking: "Jesus F'n Christ I spent $10 on the wrap and accessories for that gift have some god damned respect". Christmas cards are another story altogether, this year alone I've bought 3 boxes, I've sent none. I think I'll get on that today as well, it's hard when you work in retail, you've literally got 100's of people sucking what's left of your brainreserve daily, then your supposed to be all holly jolly at home, some years that doesn't happen for moi, some years it's kick the cats for looking at you and off to bed to rejuvenate for the next day of work. And lord knows with the back issues this fall and the physical therapy, I'm way behind in the Christmas Spirit, I shall now bitchslap the Ghost of Christmas Present and get thy holly jolly ass in gear.

And God said......

make your own damn snowflakes, thanks!

Book Blog of Note

Yeah, yeah...I will eventually update the sideblog but until then, I give you: LubbyLu!

Stupid Pet Tricks

Don't try this at home.

Paging Dr. Madonna to the front desk

"Get into the groove"

Is it wrong...

When in your mind your sucker punching the punkassbrat being a asswipe in your presence, I think not. Happy Hollydaze:D

Hippo Birdy 2 Ewe

Happy b-day to the ever loverly Pie!! xoxo < plays with Pie's hair >

Hisssssssssssssss

I've decided that there should be a new Darwin Award for Christmas shoppers. I suffer no fools, take no prisoners and fuck the flu, I will smack you down if you even sound stupid, but alas, stupidity has reached an all time high this loverly season. If your a customer when I say I don't have a book, don't give me staredown and think I can produce the title of your choice from my ass, stare all ya want, hell, gimme the evil eye, I've tried it and I have yet to shit a book out, not once, it doesn't work, so um stop with the stare downs, mmmkay. And it would be real nifty if you could make sure not to return the item just purchased because you found some slippers instead, make solid choices, for example,you might want to try thinking, I know it's a stretch....but gosh golly you can do it! Is this the year I finally snap, could be, couldn't say, but I will say this: .............I've got nothing..........., the mind is gone. Thanks and have a super day!

Ahhhhhhhh

When your competition in the Mall has a %30 off closing sale at Christmas it can kinda reek havoc on your sales plan and dampen spirits what do you do? You match the mutha's, no offense to other the store, we totally respect you, but golly.....as Emeril would say, BAM! Wooo! *dances happy Snoopy dance*! Off to work! ;)

Book Spew!

Nationally bestselling author and ABC commentator John Nance walked into the store to sign his new book and backlist titles on Friday. Mr. Nance and his wife live in the area and have done this before, no biggie, nice guy. In previous years when apparently he feels his celebrity is overwhelming he'll send his wife into the store to make sure we have stock, she tries to remain anonymous but alas, they do this about once a year, so I was glad it was just him in all his published glory making a potential Christmas gift more meaningful for some unsuspecting aviation freak. Thanks Mr. Nance!

Red Hat My ass......

"Math is hard".....yes, these very words were onced muttered out of the plastic mouths of our own tippy toed friend Barbie. Now the faired haired plastic doll has her own Linux operating system (farewell Red Hat, the Pink has arrived). When asked if Barbie enjoyed designing an operating system that little girls around the world would want to use, Barbie responded with no comment at this time as her little plastic lips don't move.

Twinkle Twinkle

In the spirit of the season I bring you....Ugly Christmas Lights.com!

Chain Bookstore Slut's UNITE!!!

Viva Le Chain!!! Maybe 10 years ago this was me, but I've grown into the older, fatter and more apathetic version!!! The Island of Misfit Toy's is a myth, not a destination, LOL!!

WED NES Day-OH!

What I liked about today: Despite leaving me a sweaty ball of flesh Physical Therapy was fun, I moved up to the bicycle and big green ball phase of my recovery. The bicycle was familiar as I believe I own a similar machine that I keep in my living room as a coat rack and cat scratching post for months now, heh. And imagine the fun I had putting the oversized ball against the wall and my back and squatted for a good 50ish reps before I was to be rewarded with the assrub and ultrasound follow through. Good Times. I also liked this quote: "The real price of everything, what everything really costs to the man who wants to acquire it, is the toil and trouble of acquiring it." *Adam Smith {1723-1790 Scottish Economist}, think on that shit for a minute, ow. I also enjoyed the yummy Pumpkin Cheesecake a very cruel employee brought to work today.

Why today sucked: Mostly because I realized that my right leg is acting as if it has experienced a freakin' stroke and has to be retrained to act normal and help in supporting me upright, I mean all that body stuff is connected (uber blonde moment). Today sucked because sales aren't' meeting expectations and I have to send employee's home early, ugh. I still don't have a tree up because I'm just too fucking tired when I get home and then I realize I've got to be up at five a.m. and start all over again, hello? Paging Dr. Excitement, your needed at my front desk, yesterday.

Carry on People, for fine reading material may I suggest popping over to the Irate Weirdo's site and read my favorite stalker's interpretation of the life of a Cheeto, impressive writing, I'm mean this guy is in touch with his inner cheesiness, LOL!

The Planets aren't outta whack

It's me, all me, my two days off I cleaned and organized, I baked cookies, I was bloated and full on bitchy then it occured to moi that I was menstrual!!! Hah!!! And I thought I was over tired or something. What a blessing it is to be a woman, what a pain in the ass to be reminded of it monthly, ock! I found this lovely image on the MSN Seattle Message Board and I feel it represents all that I'm feeling right now!
Have a most beautiful day and for your own protection, stay away. Thanks and Have a Super Fantastic Day!!!! ;) :|

Sleep is good

Sleep is good but I'm thinking the planets must be out of whack lately. A mere $60 dollars got us back into the Bargain Store with an extra key to boot, joy. My compaq still sucks but alas it was the logitech keyboard that went tits up but golly if it didn't just warp the computers already lame mind. So in typical Theresa/Cupie fashion I took every damn screw out of that keyboard and looked inside. Apparently a very small drip of peppermint tea slipped through the "internet" HOME key and kept flippin me into Stand By, when your having a marvelous Goggle experience the last thing you want to do is stop. The keyboard is now in pieces and in the garbage, but I know what they look like inside!!! Muah hahahahahhaha. So until I buy yet another USB keyboard, yes it's true, I have the last computer on the planet that uses a USB Keyboard with no option for the little round plug in, I'm on my Ol' groanie. Good Times!

Could I be in a more Pissy Mode? No.

I hate my compaq, I'm not liking being a boss right now, I hate holiday Mall hours, I don't particularly like employee's who keep fucking locking the keys in the God damn mother fucking store, Arrrrrrrrrrrrgh, look at me type with a computer older than god, look at me go to sleep in a pissy fucking rage......bah fucking humbah. :| something has got to give, please god please.

 Happy Holidays!

Supah Star *sniffffffffffffffff*

CupieSpew, the screenplay!!

Eeeeeeesh

Since this episode with my back happened my attention span has ceased to exist and as I look at my sideblog, I cringe. Now that I'm not doped up daily, I'll update the sucker. The Tag board is gone again.....heh...it sucked anyhoo. Mmmmmmkay, have a loverly day.

Deck the bloody Halls with bows of Holly, damnit.

"Tribal bands are the mullets of tattoos"-Jorge

So I survived 'Black Friday', (the day businesses actually fall into the black for the year). I dunno, things just aren't the same, it was steady all day, but overall it was unspectacular and couldn't compete or come near the frenzy of Harry Potter V. That evil commerce machine that is killing business as we speak, WAL-mart broke records selling approximately (pinky finger to lip in Dr. Evil fashion) 1.2 billion dollars!. The Fuckers. Why shop at the Mall when you can get all you need at Wal-mart for hella cheap prices? Well, for one most people that work in the Mall do speak English, if your lucky your Greeter at wal-mart will speak English, but then their 100 yrs old and have missing teeth and bad breath.

What could be that fucking important to want to wake @ 4am, stand in line in the god damned rain @ 5 am and get trampled by white trash and immigrants, legal and illegal, I guess the stupid need something to do after shoveling food in their faces for a day. The Mall opened at 7 am with little excitement and though we did better then the prior year it was uneventful.

I work for a company that prides itself on embracing 'diversity' so needless to say we have kept our Holiday decorating to a minimum as not to piss off our diverse customer base, snarf. I'm all for diversity, but for fucks sake, gimme tinsel and glittering lights at Christmas, ugh at the suits in the 'think tanks' that have complied to the uber cautious politically correct world we live in now, methinks someone needs to clean out the tank and let us have some originality in our store and for the love of God, let the fun come back to work. Mmmmkay, I'm done, fucking Wal-mart, mmmkay. Oh yeah, Happy Holidays! ;)