Happy Halloween

Yesterday, while I sloughed about with tissue in hand, watched scary movies and ignored all political discussion and will do so until I don't get physically sickened by 'poll numbers', I had a visitor on my patio a small red cheeked squirrel just kinda hung out on the patio all day. The squirrel would hang around the flower planters, then to the patio chair then on the the table; he would stare into the apartment and just watch me, watch the cats going apeshit while he just kicked back and stared into my life. And then it happened, he tired of just watching the fun and wanted to participate...I turned to see his little squirrel paws pressing on my the glass door. He backed away from the glass, ran up the arm of the chair and tried to jump through the god damned glass, *thunk* I guess he didn't notice the screen door to which he held onto for seconds before sliding down.

Stunned but not deterred, he attempted jumping into my apartment for the next four hours! After the first attempt, he just hung out by the flowers for awhile and then while making soup, I see him jump--thunk--slide--thud. My Siamese went crazy, my little black cat chattered like I've never heard her chat before; double glass panes be damned, that squirrel was coming in despite the frothing kitty's that awaited his arrival. Every time the squirrel escaped my thoughts I'd hear the thump and remember he was out there. I watched him for most the day until he finally tired of his quest and went away when the sun faded.

He's back again this morning, just sitting on my table next to the pumpkin, he hasn't attempted a 'jump' this morning and I'm off to work, so I'll miss the show today, but the cats should enjoy it. I on the other hand will be fending off costumed children at the mall, our store isn't participating in the trick or treating, sure its a community event, but it literally costs more money than I'm budgeted for of dollars and we get little return from what we've spent. I have yet to have a customer say that they shop in the store because I gave their kid some candy. Have a safe and fun Halloween.

Woe Is I Snarky

I have fallen prey to the infamous Blogger-Post-Eater I've read so much about. In that post you would have found out that I am under the weather, but then again, aren't we all under the weather? You may not be "in" the weather but, you're in your homes and in your cubicles, protected from the weather, but, under the weather, all the same...but, I digress and I've got a cold, a sore throat and cough. My nose is raw, I'm achey from a long book-heavy week and I can't muster the energy to care about my email let alone the blogosphere.

Also, the post stated: that in my hazy and snot-drenched evenings, I found little joy in the Al Pieda attack on Coulter, I should have been elated, but I was too busy blowing my nose. I barely tingled with satisfaction as some whackjob attempted to "drive towards" Ms. Katherine "Stop Counting, Mama wants a new job" Harris (threatening, indeed). I faded in and out while watching South Park on Wednesday night so I dreamt that a Douchebag a and Turd Sandwich were running for office. I barely care to get lost in meme, well except this one:

You Are a Snarky Blogger!

You've got a razor sharp wit that bloggers are secretly scared of. And that's why they read your posts as often as they can!

What kind of blogger are you? [via: ISOU]

Right, like I"m snarky, right...watch me snark, look at me, I'm snarkin' crazy. I barely have the energy to post these totally twisted reality-based Halloween Costumes via The Stranger, Its naptime, tissue time, not get lost in the internet time. Snarky and Snarfy! Right....

Okay Blogger, don't fucking lose this one, snarf!

*ah-choo*

“Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?”

Designers were invited to submit works for an exhibition called 26 Letters: Illuminating the Alphabet.

Each was given a particular letter and asked to create an art work around it.

This particular installation was based on the letter C.

It is the creation of two women designers, Morag Myerscough and Charlotte Rawlins.

Ms Rawlins said: “We had various puns ranging from ‘C U Next Tuesday’ to ‘Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?’

Let's hope Mike Hunt doesn't have crabs, keep in mind this installation is "ART" and that loose lips sink ships *eyeroll*. Have a super day!

Loose Lips

Ashleegate-I'm thinking Sir Elton John (the new Cosby) is muttering a few things about Ashlee Simpson's 'out-of-sync' track on SNL Saturday. The Show MUST Go On, you don't dance a fucking lil jig and then walk off stage, you have the stop the pre-recorded song and put the correct pre-recorded song on and lip-sync the crowd crazy or at the least until they forget your lip-syncing. This will be the last time Ashlee asks Jessica to run her lip-syncing-machine-thingy. Support Ashlee's fuck up here.

Nothing Really Matters...

Anyone can see, Nothing really matters, Nothing really matters....toooo meeeee.
LOL. ;) [via: my sister] lol.

"Who's Your Daddy?"

Apparently daddy is a bunch of guys from Boston, ya' silly bastards! I took great joy in watching the Red Sox's sucker punch the wind out of the Yankee's. I enjoyed A-Rod's, annoyed and baffled look when the Sox's won. I enjoyed that it was former Mariner pitchers Derek (hottie) Lowe and Mike Timlin that helped to keep the Yankee payroll at bay, great game.

In Search Of Intelligence Elsewhere: SETI Home

"Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." -Carl Sagan


(Area of the sky that I'm currently scanning)
For awhile now, my screensaver has been the SETI screen saver. Most of the geeks that download this screen saver are men in the 20-39 age range, so I thought I'd meet some nice single men that way... LMFAO, NOT! Actually, I joined the SETI program because I really admired Carl Sagan, I've enjoyed his books and his philosophy as a whole. Also, when given the chance to find intelligence outside of the blogoshere, politics and say...the WORLD, its only reasonable to assume that the final frontier would be the place to investigate this option. We'd be arrogant to assume, as some have, that we are alone in our Universe: although, "billions and billions" of galaxy's--not unlike our own float above our heads. Yes, their pretty and sparkly, I dig all that, but what if one of them little swirly things had a world that resembles our own? I'm 765 hours into the search for Intelligence life and I've yet to find any, but I'm hopeful.

"SETI@home actually consists of two parts: an "application" and a "screensaver". The application does all the work: it downloads blocks of data through the Internet, performs the number crunching on that data (looking for orderly patterns that might be artificial), returns the results, and gets another block of data."

I help the SETI program by scanning previously recorded files: its fun, its colorful and it keeps me humble.

Pirates & Emperors

NARRATOR: The funny thing about "pirates" and "emperors" is that they often start out as pals who get into a tiff somehow and end up enemies.

KID: You mean like Lex Luthor and Superman!

NARRATOR: Yeah, except Lex Luthor was a nice guy before he lost all his hair, whereas Manuel Noriega, Sadam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden were all known thugs and mass-murderers when they were on Uncle Sam's payroll. That's why they got the job! Either that, or Uncle Sam is just a really bad judge of character.

Watch this. OUCH, LMFAO, etc. Hmmmmm...

For Future Reference: RIP Sharon Osbourne

Shit, I hate when the day starts off with the obituary of the undead. ABC whoopsied and posted Sharon Osbourne's pre-scripted obit: I'm certain she has it framed in a gilded gold number by now. [via: Choire]

Man Booker Awarded

I had just recently read a raving review of Alan Hollinghurst's new novel The Line Of Beauty: described as a "novel of gay love in the Thatcherite 1980s"; as a matter of fact every review I've read has been glowing. Congratulations sir!
[via: every damn literary blog out there]

Requiem for a Dreamer: An Interview with Kilgore Trout, by Kurt Vonnegut

TROUT: I’ve never voted in my whole damn life. I didn’t want to be complicit. But is it time I did?

KV: The planet’s immune system is obviously trying to get rid of us, and high time! But sure, go vote for somebody. What the hell.

TROUT: Everybody’s so ignorant.

KV: The overwhelming popularity of President Bush, in spite of everything, finally shows us what the American people, whom we have so sentimentalized for so long, a la Norman Rockwell, really are, thanks to TV and purposely lousy public schools: ignorant. Count on it!

The rest of the interview can be found here. Keep in mind that "Giraffes can only have come from the future. There’s no way evolution in the past would have let something that defenseless and impractical live for 15 minutes."
[via: bookslut]

"You're as big a dick on your show as you are on any show."-Jon Stewart to Tucker Carlson

Tucker Carlson is a dick, a partisan assmonkey for the right, if you will. Follow your bliss (highly recommended by the SpewMistress), whatever, speak you mind, that is, if you got the balls worthy of such; that's all dandy, but have some fucking respect for your own opinions. I'm thinking that's the gist of the matter that Jon Stewart (short, Jewish, hottie-slurp, L'chai-im! *Hump*--what?) was trying in vain to impart on the Crossfire hosts last Friday, is that they have views of their own; not the rhetoric or their respective parties.

Sidenote: Hey, I'm all for men wearing bow-ties, I think their dead sexy; in a geeky, nonconformist way, if you choose to write slash fiction about bow-tie wearing fella's, so be it, but fuck if they aren't hot, yummy.

Anyhoo, I also think what Mr. Stewart was trying to impart on the crossover bitches, is that their show is entirely too partisan, both sides are guilty of preaching the transcripted rhetoric and shoving it down all of our throats by way of the spin sluts of both camps. Don't fucking play the candidates way, the repub way, the donkey way. Take your conservative/liberal beliefs and debate from the platform of your own beliefs; if they follow suit with any one party, okay, but state why you believe. Don't tell me what your Daddy or Mama believed, that's their shit, you have a fucking mind, know it. Stating your own beliefs is far more fucking respectable then reiterating the quotes and empty promises & bullshit from either party.

CNN, Fox, MSNBC and the like, will eventually spin us into a self-hatred unknown and a demise that is so insanely asinine, that ultimately, will be our fall; if your too lazy to ivestigate the facts of your beliefs for yourself, get the fuck over it and get all Google-ish; we have the technology, use it! For the love of fuck know your own Goddamned mind. Know what your voting for, understand why you believe the way you do and back that shit up. That's all Stewart was trying to say, yeah, Tucker Carlson is a fucking dick for playing the game, we all play that game at times in our dildoesque ways; but when playing the game one must be competent and knowing of a winning strategy; if you play the partisan way, know what your spewing, walk the talk, know your mind. You can preach partisan crap till you rot (and we all will), it don't mean shit: that is, until it means something or anything that affects your life directly, that is why I'm a liberal; your God is not my God, my body is my own and I will not have my government tell me otherwise, period.

Educate yourself and with that knowledge spewforth, don't be a dick do what you want, just know why your doing it.

Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try-Yoda

"Jimmy Breslin tries to sell the new Bill O'Reilly children's book. The extent to which vibrators and Thai sex shows are mentioned remains unclear."
-Michael Schaub for bookslut.

I have yet to sell one of these books and based on the performance of O'Reilly's last two books they sent me entirely too many, now their just sucking up shelf space waiting to become remainders. Authors please take note: avoid all sexual harassment cases, when possible, before promoting children's self-help titles; even Madonna has been able to keep her skivvies on while promoting her story books, think about it.

The Return Of William Gibson's Blog

Last September, the original cyberpunk author, William Gibson, stopped blogging to concentrate on writing his new book. We're not told if the book is finished but, he does state why he's returned to blogging; "Because the United States currently has, as Jack Womack so succintly puts it, a president who makes Richard Nixon look like Abraham Lincoln.".

After his talk, he offers to answer questions. One little boy puts up his hand and the president asks him his name.

"I'm Billy, sir."

"And what's your question, Billy?"

"I have three questions, sir. Why did the US invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?"

Just then the bell rings for recess. Bush announces that they'll continue after recess.

When they return, Bush asks, "OK, where were we? Question time! Who has a question?"

Another little boy raises his hand. The president asks his name.

"I'm Steve, sir."

"And what's your question, Steve?"

"I have five questions, sir. Why did the US invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Why did the recess bell go off twenty minutes early? And what the heck happened to Billy?"

Welcome back to the blogosphere Mr. Gibson and I agree "At times, to be silent is to lie.", find his blog here. [via: galleycat]

My Secret Garden & Fairy Tales

Lawn gnomes kinda scare me, so one day I'd like one as a gift, to confront my fear and get on with it. I'd even take this gnome as a gift, because its tacky as all hell and I want my neighbors to know that when they stop by to borrow sugar, coffee creamer, my fucking cork screw or potato peeler (yes, it has happened), that my lawn gnome will impose his will on them, liberate them and disable their language skills if they stop by to "borrow" my dry goods & kitchen utensils. Ya' see, the gnome, think twice. (I'm actually quite cordial, but I'm embracing my inner bitch tonight, as I'm tired and experiencing severe anxiety: forewarning; it would be wise to leave me alone) smooch xox. :\ [via: feministe]

A Rose by any other name would be a Pie. Rose/Pie would a very talented friend o' mine: a friend of like mind in some respects, that being she's a loner, a rebel and twisted beyond comprehension. Pie writes brilliant fairy tales and makes fabulous animations, this one, by far, is my favorite.
"Why do birds, suddenly appear, every time, you are near"-The Carpenters

Bill O' Riled Up!

"It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to
ruin it. If you think about that, you'll do things differently."

*Warren Buffett

If I thought I could get 60 million for phone sex, I may have played along, with the certified check in my pocket, however, that would make me a phone sex whore, I'll pass. Hell, I charge myself to masturbate, the fee is phenomenal and I'm broke all the time and can't afford myself, what does that tell you? Shoot me. Anyhoo, just how the fuck can you have phone sex unwillingly?

Debate #3: It's Debatable; but no one is imposing their religion on you.

"A culture of life"? Instead of an abortion, woman should abstain from sex or adopt out the bad mistake, the rape, the incest, good times ladies, grab them coat hangers femme-nazi-terrorists, you might need them and keep in mind Dubya doesn't want to impose his religion on anyone.

The medical institutions must embrace "high technology", but don't even think about buying prescription drugs from Canada or off the internet for that matter, its wrong and illegal. God forbid we ask the pharmaceutical companies, or the FDA for that matter, to make these drugs affordable, there are mortgage's on billion dollar homes at risk, so suck up the generic drugs bitches.

Raising the minimum wage is hard work, its hard--work.

(Note: both President Bush & Kerry wore red dotted power ties: Kerry's had a sheen; Bush's did not; just a fact there....pardon the fashionslut in me.)

Ted Kennedy, friend and the most liberal foe (pinky finger to lip) in the whole world!

"God wants everyone to be free", but taxed: if you have children, you save; if your married, you save; if your single and middle-incomed (low-middle/high-middle/middle-middle), your fucked; breed, marry & save, but no one is imposing their religion on you, nope.

Okay, your gay, not that there's anything wrong with that, but marriage is between a man and a woman, but nobody's imposing their religion on anyone.

Litmus tests for judges? Scoff! Any fascist will do, as long as a "culture of life" is prevalent in their mindset, but no one is imposing their religion on you.

Women must vote, Blacks must vote, middle-America must vote, (minority=everyone but white males of a certain tax bracket) you cannot lose your job if you take the time to vote, its the law, your voice matters; if you don't believe that, then the 'man' just beat you down and the 'man' wins. Even the 'man' would concede that they're nothing without the women they listen to: that's the cue ladies, vote.

Humpday Linkage

Blog vs. Blog: nominate your Favorite Bush or Favorite Kerry Blogs, or not.[via: biz]

Philip Roth interview @ nerve. [via: bs]

Shirt folding magic! "Incontheeible!". [via: db]

Novelists represent, yo.

Slate asked a variety of prominent American novelists, ranging from Edwidge Danticat to John Updike, for a frank response to the following question: Which presidential candidate are you voting for, and why? Thirty-one novelists participated, with four for Bush, 24 for Kerry, and three in a category of their own.

Orson Scott Card gets all Zell Miller...mmmkay. [via: old hag]

Political Chronic Fatigue syndrome

"By our estimation, roughly 70 percent of liberals are experiencing some degree of lethargy resulting from a glut of civil-liberties abuses, education funding cuts, and exorbitant military expenditures."

I'm fatigued, disgusted and exhausted and I've barely surfed the web today, lord have mercy.

The Seattle Storm won WNBA Championship tonight, Wooohoo! Those damn Yankee's suck all the joy out of baseball, the fuckers: school will cost a small fortune *gulp* and now the below post! Arrrrrrrgh, snarf.....*anxiety-spaz-out*
[onion link via: bjg]

The End

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Surely you jest, Mr. Penn? I've been know to jest dude & don't call me Shirley.

Team America is a statirical movie and should be treated as a 'satirical' movie, a funny "ha-ha" if you will. Sean Penn gets up in the faces of the creators, the same creators the penned great and memorable songs as "Uncle Fucker" and "Blame Canada".

To Trey Parker and Matt Stone,

I remember a cordial hello when you guys were beginning to be famous guys around Hollywood at some party. I remember several times getting a few giggles out of your humor. I remember not being bothered as you traded on my name among others to appear witty, above it all, and likeable to your crowd. I never mind being of service, in satire and silliness.

I do mind when anybody who doesn't have a child, doesn't have a child at war, or isn't or won't be in harm's way themselves, is encouraging that there's "no shame in not voting" "if you don't know what you're talking about" (Mr. Stone) without mentioning the shame of not knowing what your talking about, and encouraging people to know. You guys are talented young guys but alas, primarily young guys. It's all well to joke about me or whomever you choose. Not so well, to encourage irresponsibility that will ultimately lead to the disembowelment, mutilation, exploitation, and death of innocent people throughout the world. The vote matters to them. No one's ignorance, indcluding a couple of hip cross-dressers, is an excuse.

All best, and a sincere fuck you,

Sean Penn

P.S. Take this as a personal invitation from me to you (you can ask Dennis Miller along for the ride as well) to escort you on a trip, which I took last Christmas. We'll fly to Amman, Jordan and I'll ride with you in a (?) 12 hours through the Sunni Triangle into Fallujah and Baghdad and I'll show you around. When we return, make all the fun you want.

Ummm.....I'm guessing he wants to people to vote, I'm thinking I don't really want to see a documentary of Sean Penn with the South Park creators in Iraq on Comedy Central. Vote please. Thanks!

World Turning/World Voting

Bush leads in Libya, Congor, Niger (spammer central) and our greatest ally Azerbaijan show some love to the President, if the rest of the world could vote it would resemble this picture. :) lol.

[World Vote link via: cul]
[Donkey humping link via: In Search Of Utopia *click pic to view donkey porn]




Enjoy your day!

Superman No More: Christopher Reeves has died

Pessimism was Christopher Reeves kryptonite, he was the supreme example of optimism. In his mind, through stem cell research, his recovery was inevitable. I myself was skeptical of what science could do to remedy his situation, especially with the current limitations, but throughout, Mr. Reeves was optimistic, science would prevail. I have no links, I just saw the ABC ticker announcing his death.

May 'Superman' rest in peace and may stem cell research, at whatever capacity, continue on in his name. May America and the world understand that such research is benefical for many reasons, learning from the organic source to aid those in need is not a sin or a crime, it's human nature. Superman will continue on, Christopher Reeves does not, but thank you Christopher, thank you for the lesson and a great example of optimism.

For Lack Of Anything To Do Today Watch The Volcano

She's spewing steam today and the pictures are awesome. Watch the Volcano Cam and see for yourself.

The team a horror writer could love

Novelist John Cheever, who was born in Massachusetts but lived most of his life in New York, once said: "All literary men are Red Sox fans. To be a Yankee fan in literary society is to endanger your life."

Congratulations to the Red Sox, you have my permisson to wallup the shit out of my backup bitch the Yankee's when they make it to the play offs, hell, I think you have the worlds permission. A-rod must be denied (wearing the bitter bitch heart on my sleeve again) Gooooooo, Red Soxs! [via: beingjennifergarret]

Hey, Kids, Rock n' Roll Or Just Vote For John Kerry

Its sing-a-long time people! Vote John Kerry: A Patriotic Song by Dominic Sagolla.
Sample Lyrics:

This election,
There ain't no connection
Between 9/11 and Saddam Hussein.
Now they've gone too far;
Administration's gone insane!

[via: Biz]

My Debate Take

Bush came off stronger than last week, but I think he may have swallowed a handful of Viagra before the debate, the bulge wasn't in in back this time, it was in his crotch, which was on fire, all that testosterone shooting throught him was a scary display of power in the hands of the feeble minded. And the look of strain on his face while trying to refrain from making the same cocky smirk's almost made him explode. The debate next week should have him get all St. Helens completely, cool.

Karen Hughes comments on NBC after the debate also scared the shit out me, she is full on fucking delusional, someone must have slipped her a Viagra mickey or something and she's loving the trip, wow, freaky bitch.

This Just In:

The irony continues, the little book store that could and won't in the future, just recieved a Best Of Catagory Award from Mall Management. Being the bitter bitches my assistant Joan & I are, we opted out of the Annual Merchant Dinner at the Marriot last night (first time in years), which is where they would have presented the award to us over lukewarm buffet food. Blah, or um...Thanks, thanks for wanting someone bigger and your welcome, we were glad to stay open all those years while the ghetto mall got their shit together, banned the gang warefare (too gracious), remodeled the funkified out dated appearance and chose a new name, so you could blast our store from your confines. Again, thank you more than you'll ever know!

Alternative Names for MoveOn.org.

MoveOverPlease.org

HeyItsPrettyLateImGoingToBedNowCouldYouLeave.org

IdAppreciateChangeButIllSettleForDreadlocks.org

IAmOfTheBeliefThatArmoiresShouldntBeUsedAsGunCabinets.org

ProudAmerican.co.uk

more @ McSweeney's

GoogleLit?

Google announced the introduction of the service at the Frankfurt Book Fair, the industry's most important annual meeting, where publishers, authors and their agents convene to buy and sell the rights to publish books in countries worldwide.
The new service would allow users of Google's main search engine to search simultaneously billions of Web pages and the texts of hundreds of thousands of books for information on a given subject. They search works by looking for words or phrases in the scanned digital images of the pages of books that publishers have provided to Google.
For each book found, a user would see several pages of the book with the phrase or subject of the search highlighted. The page would also offer links to several online retailers, where the book could be bought. Publishers do not pay to participate in the program; rather, Google would make money from the service by selling advertising on the search pages, and it would share those revenues with the publishing companies.

I can't imagine why the little bookstores are fading out of the picture? Hardy-har. Change is good, change is good, change is good and when I count my small change I'll have some cash to buy food when my job is gone...teehee. ;)

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes: Part III

Evan Williams, that hotty-geek and co-founder of Pyra Labs and Blogger, is leaving the Google/Blogger family today! Good Luck, best wishes and thanks for Blogger.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes: Part II

This past week the rumors were confirmed that "the little bookstore that could" would be closing next summer. In August I was given 15 year service award by the very company that is closing my store, its shiny, gold (faux, of course) and is proudly displayed on my 15 year lanyard, the very lanyard that gets caught in between stacks of books and desk draws, leaving me gasping for air and I am quite certain its out to do me in, the bitch. I'm not really shocked by this revelation, the rumors have been rampant for years now and although its 8 to 10 months out, the reality has been draining, because its just not me losing a job I love, its my employees as well and now that its official, dealing with their emotions has sucked my energy. It has been a dreadfully long week.

Over the years staff members have come and gone, but many of my original staffers remain in one capacity or another. The seasonal folks that run the Calendar Store for me 3-4 months of the year and swear each year that their never coming back are even sad. I have a superior crew and they are certain to find places at the big box bookstore moving into the mall. The big-box is actually the same company that I work for, so many ironies, woohoo. I won't be making the move to the big-box, they pay their supervisors significantly less than I make now and refuse at any point in my life to take a step backwards, I can't afford to, especially within the same company I work for now, how fucking lame is that? I do appreciate the fact that my boss respected me enough to be up front about the closure, they never disclose a store closure until a few months prior to the closing, to prevent loss prevention issues and prevent people bailing in search of a secure position in life, (how dare they?). The bosses have even started looking into opening an Outlet store for me to run, I'm flattered and if that comes to fruition, then I may come back, who can say?

The store is running in the top three of the District, the top 15 of the Region and in the top 100 of the company for the first time in years. So, our goal as a team is to continue keeping the numbers high and leave on top of our game. I know my bosses would like me to stay with the company, but I'm ready to get on with the second half of my life. I was too busy with parties and concerts in my youth to be bothered with an education, so I'm going to get me an edjuamakation, most likely in multi-media & web design, I need to create, I have the talent and I'm grabbing the bull by the horns and riding the bitch till it passes out, again, woohoo. I'm looking forward to school, unemployment checks and the severance package. I'm not looking forward to having to pay more for my books, Hell, I'll miss the discount more than I'll miss the job. I won't miss retail at all, I won't miss working 8 gazillion hours a week during the holidays. However, I will miss my peers and co-workers. 15 years is a long time with one company, but these people are part of family and will not be forgotten. 19 years selling books has been a joy, but its time to move on, for me at least. I'm looking forward to the future, I'm scared, but ultimately excited.

Retail is changing, all the stores will be huge and the little guys will go bankrupt so that the consumer can have all the choices their minds, most likely, can't handle. Our society is moving at warp speed and now even Scotty has Alzheimer's and doesn't remember how to slow the engine. In the future, Malls could be open 24 hours for your convenience, Sundays included. I will NOT miss retail. It's a 24 hour world now, as for me, I'll continue taking things at my own pace, like retarded turtle of sorts, slow, methodic, wave at the fast rabbits, draw pretty pictures and animations and while I'm at it stop and eat some foliage just for the hell of it. Yum, life is tasty.

Thursday Schmursday

Okay, so the below post is an example of Andy's work, there a brain in there not littered by the excesses of beer and gluttony, not that there's anything wrong with that. ;) I overslept this morning, call it exhaustion, call it lazy, so I give you muffins for breakfast, enjoy. [via: Irate Weirdos]

Noodles & Underwear Can Get You Arrested: especially if your Michael Moore.

Those fucking douche bag Michigan Republicans are trying to get Michael Moore arrested for promising college students noodles and underwear if they promise to vote this November as part of Mr. Moore's "Slacker Uprising Tour". Good freakin' lord, hey, I promise I'll sniff that underwear if you promise to vote this November. However, do note that the underwear has to be clean and you pay the postage, I'm a cheap bitch. How about that you sorry ass chumps? Now get over your sorry-ass selves and get on with doing your job, feed the poor, hell, find them a job, but for the love of marshmallow, leave the man alone. Jesus F'n Crisco! [via: ratboy's anvil]

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes

I can be an overly mushy blogger and when I try to think straight and say things clearly, I still end up sounding like a bleeding heart liberal and the next thing you know I want to hug everyone, hug the hate away, hug the bullshit away and on a good day hug the living shit out of conservatives. Well, that's one thing that will never change, but what will change is how the Spew is delivered.

I have invited Andy Steinsomthing to be my chief Political Spew Master (oh yes, I do like that title better, don't you Andy?) Mr. Steinsomething, is an employee and friend of mine with a brilliant mind and a similar belief structure as my own, with the exception that he'll deliver more concise political assessments and analysis without the word 'fuck', I think, its ok to curse here, hell, I encourage it, spew baby, spew! Also, he is also a massive book-geek so I expect him to post book reviews as well, heh. Andy will be covering Friday's debate and any other political spew he wants to! So it is written, so it is done.

Yes, there will still be insanely unimportant propaganda that I will share.
Yes, I will rant like a banshee on crack when the epidemic of stupidity runs rampant in our society and yes, I will continue to tell you when I'm menstruating, because its just nice to share.

Wha- What? Humpday Wonders

Dick Cheney has never met John Edwards? Wow, to treat your running mate like the chick you may have knocked up after a one nighter, shame, shame. Looks like Cheney could use some Ginko Biloba or a lobotomy. [via: overspun, via: Kos]



Say What? Say: "Hey Now!"

Life is changing at warp speed and now it looks like
Howard Stern has signed a satellite deal with Sirius starting 2006, that's him saying..."eat me, FCC", this is me saying satellite is not in my budget.."Fuck."

Say, woof!

This is Pie & Rob's loverly, if not a little high strung, pooch Nugget. I just thought this was the cutest damn animal pic I've seen in awhile and thought it had to be shared. Now, vote for Nugget here at Jones Soda, because he's so damn cute.

I forgot to link to parity, for shame, me bad, anyhoo...'parity' belongs to Rob and he's a funny fucker when he posts! ;)

OMG, Wonkette was on NBC

She's done it, I love her. OMG....God Bless Ana Marie Cox or rather, Wonkette, I'm easy. *waves & blows kisses* LMFAO @ "Staypuff Marshmallow Man" If that were true of Cheney, I would have ate him by now, ahem...anyhoo [cut away to commercial] wow, the other dude was dust in the eyes of the world, while our own Wonker babe tickled the masses, btw, I do love marshmallow, yum.<

Dude, Cheney was so gay tonight! Debate That!

To see Dick Cheney's face completely soften when the issue of his family and openly gay daughter came into discussion during the debates tonight, was the first time I have ever saw this man as a human. He was respectful of his daughters life, John Edwards was respectful towards Cheney, Cheney thanked Edwards, I teared up and thought, if only briefly, Dick Cheney, you've got balls, two as a matter of fact and your pride in your daughter was a banner moment in your life history. Gay Marriage will come to pass one day, because, God is in all of us and does not deny us at any given moment, that is, unless you ask God for some cash or a tax cut.

My mother noted that you kinda have to search out what I'm all about, is she a democrat? Is she a republican? What the fuck is this Cupie, spewing about? Now, some of you have caught on immediately to the general vibe of what I'm about, gold stars for all of you. First and foremost I'm a LIBERAL and not ashamed to proclaim my standing. I believe that it takes a village, I believe that we help others when others are in need, I believe that children are the future, teach them well and let lead the way, show them all the beauty that they have inside...lol, I'm a hoot.

The bottom line is, it's our humanity that gives us the edge in the game of survival. Truth is our divining rod and those truths will lead us once again to be the great country we once were in the eyes of the world. I will not perpetrate hate on my site, tolerance and understanding is the key to power and democracy. Yes, its true Ann Coulter makes me want to advocate hate, but she's just a tiny blonde with a small and closed mind feeding the haters. I won't hate, I love you, them and um...those guys in the corner *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*. ;)

This election is not about 'waffles', flip-floppin' and who's right and who's wrong, this election is about the direction of our country for the next four years. As a divided country, there should be balance of ideas and opinions. John Kerry as president and John Edwards as vice president would do our country justice in the eyes of the world. This is not a theocracy, sure God is just, but God is not George W. Bush. President Bush is not the end-all, be-all, do-gooder for the world, even Cheney would concede that. All we want is the truth, fairness and a balance.

In the next few days to come, the facts will be scrutinized while a thousand more Sudanese die at the hands of state proclaimed genocide, it's not all about 'us'. Our place in the world should be one of common thought, perseverance, with a top-note of humanity that lingers, hopefully, in our senses.

Who wins this debate? Edwards for showing our need for the truth, for showing that he and Kerry are a team and for showing that despite the fact that Cheney and Bush distort the truth to appease those who are unwilling to educate themselves in matters of the 'big picture', it will ultimately be truth that prevails. The truth in who and what we are as a country will get us through (God willing) to the next millennium, honestly.

Monday Spew, Ugh.

Blogger was giving me no love this morning, it is now loving me, the bitch. I do not like Mondays, thanks. Anyhoo, I come to spew and therefore someone needs to hand me a spew-bag or perhaps I'll just put the drama behind me and um...type. Without further adieu, Cupie spews.

Book Spew!


*Save lots of space and money for this "Biography"
Need a new dictionary? Got $13,000?

*The New York Times gives some serious love to the literary blogs in an essay entitled "The Widening Web of Digital Lit". Digi Lit should not be confused with Chick Lit, Hip Hop Lit or Tit Lit. Thanks. [via: bookslut]

Politickle Spew!


Okay, thats enough for today, I'm tired, bitchy and tomorrow I have to be at work by 6:30 a.m. Shoot me now with your high powered and legal novelties. Until I spew again....Cupie, out, gone.com......ow.

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd; - Alexander Pope

I just finished watching Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind, I loved this movie. Can you erase the pain of love lost? Sure. Can you change your mind? Sure, if it was meant to be or rather, always was or is...omg, *splat*. Do we really understand that wired mass of gray matter? Can we really manipulate the inevitable? Is Destiny a child? LOL, I jest, this movie is a mind fuck to be sure; it is eloquent, confusing and as a whole, satisfying. I give it two snaps, a smack on the ass and lick the cheek for good measure (two thumbs up). Watch it.

Thar She Blows!

Mount St. Helens blew today, unfortunately I was knee deep in a huge shipment of 2005 calendars and missed seeing any plumage and just caught it on the 11 o' clock news. I am thoroughly exhausted from a busy day, but I guess the mountain is more exhausted than me, I'm sore from receiving 150+ boxes, St. Helens is sore from shooting ash, steam and rock from her 'dome' and all that's left is a gaping hole in her um, dome. My dome is fine, thanks. Anyhoo, here's the video of the noonish blowout, enjoy the wrath of nature. More eruptions to come! G'night.

Debate Games

For the next two debates try Debate Bingo! [via pie]
Or try a nice Debate drinking game, take a drink every time Bush smirks, take a drink every time you hear Wrong War, Wrong Place, Wrong Time. Alcohol poisoning is assured.

Loverly Book Spew

Review Of America:

"I did what any sane consumer would: jumped in at random and let the book have its way with me until the candy-store shelves were empty."--Tom Carson, NYT's

The New York Times gives some serious love to Literary Blogs in a essay entitled "The Widening Web of Digital Lit": not to be confused with Chick Lit, Hip Hop Lit, Slash Lit or Tit Lit (Erotica); digi lit is so very hip. [via: bookslut]