Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Ruby Tuesday

The Internet folks just love some pussy action, I do too, I love my cats. :D I own two cats, a tiny little black cat named Ruby and a mammoth bitchy Siamese named Sophie. "The girls", as I lovingly call them, hate each other and are both very territorial of their person, me and I survive to tell this tale.

If one cat sits on my keyboard, damned if the other is seconds behind ready to fry the computer altogether; mind you, two cats sitting on a keyboard staring you dead on is some scary shit. They compete for my attention and I try to balance that attention to the best of my ability, although I know the attempt is futile and it will be me that is eventually sliced and diced when they feel it has become unbalanced. If one cat sleeps near my head at night, then the other must follow suit, there have been countless times I've awaken to cat ass in my face and when I turn my head for relief, more cat ass in my face. Cat's are kinda scary to own, but totally beyond cool, because they are independent, because they don't need to be bathed (unless you want to die a bloody death) and because, they comfort you even when you don't need comforting, bless dem lil' fur balls.

They say that cats take on the personality of their owner, so mine tend to hide when company arrives or if they're familiar with the people visiting, they stick their kitty asses in their faces, rub it, rub it NOW! I have as of yet to stick my ass in in anyones face that has visited me, but ya' never know. I can't open a can of soup without both cats screaming me "meow, meow, MEEEEEEEEEOOOOOW", which has reduced me to going into the bathroom, closing the door and opening a can of friggin' soup. I have yet to rub up against anyone who opens a can of chili.

But, what of a cat owner taking on the personality of their cat? True, given catnip, I'd rub all over you. If you didn't clean my cat box for over a week, I'd piss on your pillow too! Bitch. And yeah, if I were cleaning my crotch for the umpteenth time that day and you decided to vacuum and made me move, I'd give you a contemptuous glare that would make you wish you didn't have to sleep at night. If I felt unright for what ever reason, I'd eat a shitload of grass and hork it on your favorite throw rug, complete with the hairball from lickin' my crotch for the umpteenth time. I don't do any of these things, but, I do admit to being independent and bitchy and sometimes I like to be petted, but for the most part, I'm just a fleshy, hormonal wench with some linkage to share so I shall, if you want to pet my pussy go to the bottom of the page and pet my cyber-adopted kitty Jezzebelle, she'll attack your cursor if you do it right, purrrrhaps cats do take on human qualities! ;)

Love Is Love Is Love
All these simple little things that make you feel love in your heart - are stripped from my soul when the current Californian laws state that marriage is only defined as between a man and woman. What gives the Government this right to judge and decide whom I should love and give my life, commitment, heart and soul to? The Government should be more concerned with terrorism, poverty, homelessness, orphans, crime rate, unemployment, health care, welfare and issues that are far more important than telling same-sex couples, "YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO MARRY." I love my partner more than life itself and for me not to be there sharing my life with her is a crime. [via]

My second favorite Gary posts on Sanitarium (Rick Sanitorium or something like that) and God bless his ass for it:
"That's’s right; I am drowning in a sink hole filled with a frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter. Yes, you guessed itÃ?…I am drowning in Santorum!"

Brilliant if I say so myself, and apparently I just did. What did you do? I said it myself bitch, why? Nevermind. Alrighty.


Celebrity, sobriety and gay men all around, I'll take two, yum! WOOoOoooOOOoooHoooOoOOOo!
Maria meets Dave Chappelle and Jay from Queer Eye For The Straight guy and I'm fucking full on jealous, bitch. (Okay, so the whole "Bitch" Rick James shit is over-used, but like myself, that's okey dokey, sometimes we're a stretchy species)
I hope Dave's not mad that I put that picture up.

Rob had to go up to Tip Top Shoes on 72nd to check on a demo in progress and at this point we'd met up with Kat's cousin Kelly. We walked down the boardwalk to a gazebo where we roosted in the shade and people watched for about an hour. Then we moseyed up to Tortilla Flats for some Mexican food and margaritas. Just what the doctor ordered. Their margaritas are the best. As we sat there enjoying our food I glanced over at the bar to see yet another strangely familiar face. Guess who it was? Do you give up? Okay, I'll tell you.

It was Jai Rodriguez from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. In case you don't watch (you fuck), he's the one in charge of culture, i.e., music, arts, jewelry, etc. If you have never watched Queer Eye, you are missing out on seeing this cutie impart his knowledge and wisdom of all things fine upon the hopeless lads that they makeover on the show.

OMFG, I'm such a literati slut for him, you can almost smell it....(scratch n' sniff option has been disabled)
Master of ceremonies is Neal Pollack. *quiver*