Avast! Me Wheaties are working!

Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow is a "Scallywag" and I'm here to tell you that I wouldn't be adverse to being scallied or wagged by him! With that said, The Pirates Of the Caribbean: Dead Mans Chest website is up and working. It's a game and once you've found all the required "plunder" you can get into Davey Jones' locker and check out his booty, what you find in his booty, is your business. It's a fun site...so, click to yer hearts content. I tried clicking Depp's clothes off, it didn't work. Arrrrrr.
[link via Disney Blog]

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Cubicle Pirate Scott Adams:

Pragmatic Party
I often fantasize about how I would fix everything if I were President. My fantasy is unfazed by the fact that the voting public is not keen on candidates that are unqualified, unattractive, godless, and morally bankrupt.

In my fantasy I form what I call the Pragmatic Party. All of my policies would be based on what is most practical. I would accuse my opponents of basing their policies on superstition, i.e. the belief in supernatural beings. That's called framing the debate. It's also why I could never be elected. Well, that plus the parts about being unattractive, unqualified, and morally bankrupt. I'd get a ding for those things too.

You need one Big Idea when you run for President. I would explain that our current system of government was conceived prior to the Internet, electronic mass media, and sophisticated polling methods. 200 years ago the only practical form of government involved voting for a small group of individuals that would pretend to represent you. Now we have better tools and we should use them. I would thus infer that my opponents are hole-pooping cavemen desperately clinging to the past. Again, thatÂ?s called framing the debate. I'd get lots of TV time because the media would consider me a loose cannon. They like that.
[read the rest]

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Arianna Huffington is a smart wench. First, she decides to attend the WSJ's "D: All Things Digital" conference. Secondly she takes John Cusack as a travel partner - wink, wink. Thirdly, she shares some tidbits of a conversation with the philanthropist-techno-uber-geek Bill Gates:

"YouTube: He's a fan, but if Microsoft was doing it they'd be facing endless copyright and licensing problems." (not to mention it would frequently crash)
and...
"Clippy (Microsoft Word's much-reviled paperclip assistant): Dead."

Long live Clippy! The little bitch.

Clippy Fan Fiction:

I was walking down the street when I thought I spotted him. It was just a small glimmer in the noontime sun, and it could have been anything. I had a feeling, though, that it was him.

I got a little closer and saw that I was not mistaken. Right there in front of me, looking a bit run down, sporting a bit of stubble, showing signs of rust, and sleeping in a puddle of his own urine was none other than Clippy: the paper clip assistant made (in)famous by Microsoft Word. [read the rest]