Thursday, August 25, 2005

Blog Semisnarf!

Blog panels are the new Town Meetings, so why wouldn't another million or so people want to pay for a Blog Seminar? Learning valuable tools to garner a market share of whatever you wish. Now, you could spend $50 dollars to attend a seminar or you could take my advice as based on the discussion list at the aforementioned blog seminar. It's a Win/Win with a ramping up you'll never forget:

Who Should Blog? Who Should not --- Who really cares, the point of blogs is personal expression and if you want to tell the world about your ass herpes or how everything is your parents fault and that's why you tattooed Tommy Lee's dick above your ass crack, well golly, that's your business, your readership is reading your blog because they dig that shit, ce le vie.

What to Blog About - Blog Writing Tips If your a whore, blog away. If your a geek, blog away, if your a back seat pundit - blog like your shit don't stink - but keep it real folks: you did except cash for that tryst with the Senator's aid, you did create a cyber love toy that calls you stud when you tickle and byte it and yes, try as you might, your shit doth stink so be prepared for the repercussions good or bad. Also, keep in mind that whatever you choose to blog about, proper grammar and punctuation are a must or die a slow cyber death.

How to Build a Blog Audience Tit's, pussy, long dong silver, ass-fucking and Courtney Love. Add a dash of God, a smattering of Bush, a dose of Literary snarkability and some yummy hate. Or, comment on other blogs, link to other blogs, there isn't a blog whore out there who doesn't know who links to them. Self promotion = self preservation. Also, an article I read recently in Business Week suggested having a "Scandal" to increase "hits" or "page visits". I myself don't do drama and take a pass on scandalous behavior, I've no time for it, it interferes with what sanity I have left, so I muddle about as an Adorable little Rodent in the Blogosphere Ecosystem.

Advertising on Blogs: A great opportunity or a waste of money? Exactly how much of your soul are you willing to part with? The choice is yours.

Why Fortune 500 Companies Are Betting Big on Blogging - because they dig jumping on a well established bandwagon tested and created by others so they don't have to do the work and reap millions, while you collect $13 dollars in Amazon Gift Certificates, right on.

Establishing a Corporate Blogging Strategy and Policy No posts on ass-fucking, sell more stuff, to more people - with stuff.

Knowing what's being said about your company A mission statement in 500 blog posts, I can do that job for you, lets talk.

How to Monitor Blogs Stare at them long enough and they'll monitor you.

Any other tips are welcome in the comments. Thanks and have a loverly day.