And I'm floating in the most peculiar way And the stars look very different today

"Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought - particularly for people who cannot remember where they left things." -Woody Allen

*You can follow Discovery's return flight home.

*Creepy sounds via Saturn's radiation here. ooOOOOOooooAAAAAwwwwwswooOOOOosh. [via slog]

*Hot Space Stud Of The Day!

Little Bits O Politick...*ticks* *twitch*

July 29 (Bloomberg) -- Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, in a split from President George W. Bush, said he supports expanding U.S. funding to study embryonic stem cells as potential treatments for disease.

Well slap my ass and call me Superman! Frist has finally done something to show the world he does indeed have a full set of balls!
A freeper responds [via shakes]

"Rotten traitorous b*stard! And this is the GOP leadership???? Forget it! I am DONE with them. First they ginore the borders. Then they coddle the religion of murder. Now, what the heck? Let's cannibalize the unborn! The GOP is no better than the Democrats."

Oh my, somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, perhaps even the wrong bed. Progress is scary, change can make you numb, stem cell research will hopefully save you from yourself when your older, but okay, if you dig dementia, Alzhiemers, Cancer and a variety of ailments which will mostly likely hold you and your body hostage in the future, bitch away. We are our own worse enemy, aren't we now. Oh yeah and as far as the cannibalization of the unborn, that's just silly, Baby-eating is so very last year.
~~~~~
While we all pay through the nose for everything under the fucking sun....

Tom DeLay thinks the federal treasury is his personal piggy bank. DeLay slipped "a $1.5 billion giveaway to the oil industry, Halliburton, and Sugar Land, Texas" into the energy bill.

Fuckers.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show in 30 seconds, re-enacted by bunnies.

How I do enjoy the rabbit thespians and I've always been a fan of Rocky Horror, I'm twisted like that.
View clip here.

Clean Chubbies Cause Controversy, Crap!

Ample chicks bathe, I should know this, I bathe all the damn time, it's just considerate to the other humans who have to sniff your stink on a regular basis. The Dove Chubs are a very successful ad campaign if your pissing off chumps like movie critic Richard Ropert, your a success.

"Chunky women in their underwear have surrounded my house. ... I find these ads a little unsettling. If I want to see plump gals baring too much skin, I'll go to Taste of Chicago, OK?

"When we're talking about women in their underwear on billboards outside my living room windows, give me the fantasy babes, please. If that makes me sound superficial, shallow and sexist -- well, yes, I'm a man."

This remark by Ropert caused some rather bitter email to come his way and being a journalist he responds that the campaign is flawed and what exactly is it are they trying to sell? It's just fucking shameful Dove got on the "firming" bandwagon, when any chub with a goddamned brain can tell you that it's exercise, not soap, that will tighten the tummy and firm the thighs and buttocks.

The women in the ad are all beautiful, and it's not like they have massive folds of skin to lift to show their um..girlie parts..it's a tasteful ad in my opinion, what's not tasteful are Roperts cocky comments, basically he's a pompous prick, sure, his tastes are his own, but he doesn't have to be dick about it. I suggest that chubs unite and threaten to sit on Ropert and suffocate him, perhaps a more respectful approach, say, the chubs could through their food at the mofo, yes?
[link via]

Hump Day Schmump Day

Is that a relic in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Ancient phallus unearthed in cave
A sculpted and polished phallus found in a German cave is among the earliest representations of male sexuality ever uncovered, researchers say.

The 20cm-long, 3cm-wide stone object, which is dated to be about 28,000 years old, was buried in the famous Hohle Fels Cave near Ulm in the Swabian Jura.

The prehistoric "tool" was reassembled from 14 fragments of siltstone.

Hey now, a cave girl has to do, what a cave girl has to do! Actually, the 14 fragments were really parts of ancient petrified cucumber, but ok, if you want it to be a penis, let it be a penis, even cave girls can be resourceful.

Just Another Manic Monday, Oh eee Oh, Wish It Was Sunday, But It's Fucking Tuesday, Oh ee Oh La di da

-"Honey, do these Gap clothes make me look like a fat hideous cow and do I really dance like that?" Welcome to the virtual Gap world of Watch Me Change; design your body, hair and face, and then cover that shit up with something already, christ. When I did it, I had really big boobies and virtually no waistline, I fucking love the internet! [via adrants]

-I just saw Hillary Duff's Candies commercial and promptly jammed the first sharp object I could find in my eye, my cat still doesn't understand why she's hanging from my eye socket, ah, well, its good to accessorize.

-Microsoft says it is they who have the whole world in it's hand, um...ok.

FYI
-Currently I am reading Chuck Klosterman's Sex, Drugs & Cocoa Puffs, the title alone is brilliant, a potential band and or blog name, a tour de force of pop culture up in your face, so far, we like very much.

-And speaking of forces and tours and whatnots, if the Tour de France was a boil on your ass it would be wise to LANCE it, wouldn't you?

-The Space Shuttle Discovery was launched successfully a few minutes ago, whew! Godspeed and say hi to Scotty for me.

-David Sedaris has got cooties, yum.

"Why do you do that?" I asked, and she looked at me, saying, "Germs, silly. All kinds of people have had their heads against that seat back. Doesn't that just give you the creeps?" And I admitted that it had never occurred to me.

"Well, you'd never lie on a hotel bedspread, would you?" she asked, and again: why not? I might not put it in my mouth, but to stretch out and make a few phone calls-I do it all the time.

"But you wash the phone first, right?"

"Umm. No."

"Well, that is just . . . dangerous," she said.

In a similar vein, I was at the grocery store with my sister Lisa and noticed her pushing the cart with her forearms.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Oh," she said. "You don't ever want to touch the handle of a grocery cart with your bare hands. These things are crawling with germs.Â?

Is it just Americans, or does everyone think this way? In Paris once, I went to my neighborhood supermarket and saw a man shopping with his cockatiel, which was the size of a teen-age eagle and stood perched on the handle of his cart.

"See?" Lisa said. "ThereÂ?s no telling what foot diseases that bird might have." She had a point, but it's not like everyone takes a cockatiel to the grocery store. A lifetime of shopping, and this was the first exotic bird I'd ever seen browsing the meat counter.

-Bloody 'ell

A public service announcement: If you are American, and use British spellings like "favour" and "realise," and if you ever, ever use the word "bloody" as an intensifier, then you are worse than Hitler and fuck you.

Wanker, heh. [via]

A little bit O' dis & a little bit O' dat

Logogle fun.

- The 40 Year Old Virgin trailer.

- 10 Web Fads you may be guilty of participating in, I know NOTHING!

- EXTREME Sidewalk Art.

- Put the bong down and press the button.

The Politics Of Dancing

[via ratboy's anvil]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Downing Street Memo!!!

That silly Ann Coulter forgot that in lieu of original content, copying & pasting is fun and all, but shouldn't you always include your sources? Silly, silly succubus.

Pollack on Roberts (click link for free porn)

Meanwhile, President Bush has nominated the whitest man in America for the Supreme Court. If I were an anti-abortion timber company executive, or a brainwashed automaton, I would consider John Roberts (whose name sounds like it should belong to a protagonist in a bad Bruce Willis action movie), a fine nominee. But instead, I'm an abortion-loving atheist with Jew blood. George Carlin is the only nominee who would really satisfy me. Those odds are long.

I'd have to agree, Carlin is the only nominee that would satisfy me, hell, he should be president.

Have a lovely Sunday. :)

Potter Fodder

I finished Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince. First off, I knew who the Prince was and secondly, I liked it, I really did. I won't spoil it for anyone, but I'll link to those who will.

"I solemnly swear, I am up to no good"

Lumos created by Dizzy.

Interview with J.K. Rowlings @ The Leaky Cauldren.

Here's a clip of a soul sucking Dementor taking away a bit of joy for some people. "You Bitch!".


You are a GRYFFINDOR!

As a Gryffindor and as an STP, you are adventurous,
impulsive, and value heroism. You enjoy
challenges, and are risk-taking, adaptable, and
practical. Since you value freedom and
flexibility, you dislike structure and may bend
rules that you feel are too stifling. When
faced with a practical problem, you approach it
with courage, flexibility, and resourcefulness.
You are also analytical, logical, and
pragmatic.


Hogwarts Sorting Hat: Based on Myers-Briggs Personality Typing
brought to you by Quizilla

"I'm givin' it all she's got Captain!" -Scotty

Sore throat, cough, achey, bitchy = Potter Rot = Anemic Blog.

I used to crush on Captain Kirk something fierce and then I was all lusting after Spock, sadly, my backup bitch, Scotty, has passed on to greater things; RIP James Doohan.

This potential SCOTUS has a SCROTUM

John G. Roberts Jr., he will be confirmed and Karl Rove and Robert Novak will walk hand in hand into the sunset, shoot me.
[via]

Ongoing Investigations Drinking Game

Drinking games are a hoot, political drinking games are hazardous to your health.


[via Wonkette under "leak Speak"]

Uh........ummmm...

#$@#$!!H a r Ry Poootte R (*&*#@! *twitch* I woke up a few minutes ago, Harry Potter crumpled beneath, the little slut, I jest, I'm delirious -- my head just bobs around as I stare into space thinking all the while, I need more sleep. The head continues to bob about, I think of food and remember I'm nauseas. Focusing a bit, I see an image of Larry David on the T.V.. I smile, wipe the spit from the corners of my mouth and ignore that fact that I was exhausted, I'll just read a bit more, watch some more of that funny jew man, SERENITY NOW!

I wrote that early yesterday evening, just prior to falling asleep again. Today I am renewed with the spirit of selling, truly I am, I can't wait to get to work! *quiver* =P

Midnight Harry Potter Party

It's 2:47 a.m., we are hot, sweaty and tired. Six months from now, when I'm no longer employed at the mall I presently work at, I'm going to rip them a new asshole on this blog because they are complete and utter morons to the nth fucking degree. Their "Security" (unarmed rent-a-cops) Guards pissed me off, pissed off my line of people, sending some away and now must die a slow painful death. So, needless to say the "Security" Guards got a big dose of Cupie attitude up in their face and they tried to dish it back to no avail, because they can kiss my jiggly fat ass. Other than that, kids got their books, adults got their books for their "kids" ;) and all is well in the Potter Universe. Overall, a good experience, I just have no fucking respect for the mall bitches. Tomorrows another day and with the lack of proper sleep, I should be a bucket of SUNSHINE!

The first Sentence of Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince:

It was nearing midnight and the Prime Minister was sitting alone in his office, reading a long memo that was slipping through his brain without leaving the slightest trace of meaning behind.

Dude, I can so relate.

Those "Enlarge your PENIS" junk mails are infectious

Hlaing Thar Yar, Myanmar - Chicken-seller Thin Sandarin had always dreamt of being a man.

When she inexplicably grew a penis last month, the 21-year-old treated it as an awe-inspiring omen - as have the thousands of stunned villagers who have travelled to a pagoda to see him.

"On the morning of the full moon day of June 21, I noticed my thing (sex organ) was not the same as before," Thin Sandar, who now goes by the male name Than Sein, said on Wednesday.

"And my breasts disappeared," Than Sein added. "So I called out and showed it all to my mom and dad. It was very strange." [via]

It's not enough I have to shave my legs, now I could have to strap down my weenie, fucking great.

Harry Potter Is The New Dylan

Today's kids are processing these revolutionary times through their Dylan, the ringing anthem that is the story of Harry Potter. How else do we explain the way those books resonate with children, how they've tied up the book industry's printing capacity as publishers rush to release an unprecedented first run of 10.8 million copies of the U.S. edition of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince this week.

Alllllllrighty!

"God be with all bookstore employees today."

Couldn't we just use the Patronus charm on Karl Rove and call it a day? No? Alrighty then. Tonight is the night, the gazillion of boxes in my backroom will be ripped open and displayed, children and adults alike will tear the living shit out of my store and we'll reward them with freebee's, treats and fabulous Potteresque shenanigans and then do it over again tomorrow for different people - who will trash the shit out of my little store. I haven't started drooling yet, that's a good sign. The phone rings off the hook, hurried voices asking if we will sell them a book, "please, omg I forgot to reserve it!". Snappy judgmental Christians have had their say as well, "Potter is evil" stated one woman when I asked her if she'll be attending the party and I said "yeah, he's evil and that Wizard of Oz was a shout out from Satan himself". Do not fear the Potter, it's fiction folly folks, no fear.

Reg Grant, professor at Dallas Theological Seminary, has noticed that protests have been muted as the sixth book, "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince," was readied for release on Saturday. He wasn't surprised to hear that Harry dropped off the top-10 list of the ALA's most protested books last year.

Thank God for that, literally.

- Harry Potter:
A series of books that most people haven't read but don't hesitate to criticize, anyways.
- Albus Dumbledore:
Teenage heart-throb. Dead-ringer for Gandalf the White.

- Sirius Black:
Two words: flying motorbike. Two more words: damn sexy.
[pilfered from the Dizzy one]

"Talk Show Feng Shui"

As if this constant movement of letters weren't distracting enough, the words "The Daily Show" also continuously radiate forward from the back of the screen in smaller white caps, originating from directly behind Stewart's head. I don't have the graphic-design vocabulary to describe this accurately, but let's just say that you can no longer watch The Daily Show without struggling to block out two constant, and competing, written reminders that you are, indeed, watching The Daily Show. On its own, the continuous blue scroll might have been forgivable, though it does give the studio a more claustrophobic feel than before. But those radiating white caps are just maddening. It's as if Stewart's head is actually producing the letters, like promotional dandruff. Call me obsessive (though I like to think of it as detail-oriented), but the Daily Show is the only unmissable staple in my daily television diet, and looking at those letters every night may seriously compromise my quality of life.

Somebody had to say it. I get physically illDizzy, nauseous and stressed watching the scrolling "Daily Show" behind Jon Stewarts head. A new studio, fabulous; trying to kill people with the new studio, not cool. Last nights show didn't hurt as much, during an interview with Bernard Goldberg there was a static image, whew. What sucked was Goldberg and his book 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America : (and Al Franken Is #37), the problem I have with the book is that Goldberg is doing exactly the same thing that the people in the book are doing talking smack and chippin' away at the moral fabric of America. Sure, some of the people in the book are asschumps, but it is best to lead by example and to call the Hollywood types "Nazi's" as he did on last nights show is so very two months ago. The book profiles celebrities and politicians and their diabolical crusty nature, but only one word can be found under Courtney Love's name; "Ho.". So there you have it, Bernard, you are no better then "them", especially when you play "Stick & Stones" as well as the people who in your opinion are screwing up America, it's more like screwing down America, pigeon-holing works both ways.

Turd Blossom & The Half Blood Prince

Ya know wut I'm tawkin' bout, ya know wut I'm sayin'? Yo. So I'm thinking about Rove and what a tremendous manipulating douchetard (one who douches their bung hole vs. their flappy folds and yonder hole)he is and I thought to myself, "myself, why duntcha Google yerself some Turd Blossom or better yet lets break it down and Google what it really is...A Shit Rose...Google that and see what you can get." Uh, okay;

Sexy women shit rose pedals, pee early mornin' dew by Mark Stella

Washington, DC- After a thorough investigation, the Secret Sausage Government has confirmed that sexy women shit rose pedals and pee early mornin' dew.

Since the 1940's, men have always believed that foul odors could never creep out the orifices of something as magnificent as a beautiful woman. Thanks to the latest technologies, drug sniffing cats and bowel fetishists, this once appetizing fantasy is now a fact.

The SSG has not studied these activities in ugly women. However, they are warning men that if it looks and smells fowl in the bowl; that person you thought was a woman could actually be a man.

Good news, if your a sexy woman you'll be shittin' rose petals, however, if your Karl Rove your boss enduringly calls you "Turd Blossom", all silliness aside, a squidgy bit of poo that slipped past the chocolate starfish only to scar your tightie whities with a skidmark of um...MASS DESTRUCTION..is not funny at all, kinda. The thing is, you didn't know that your ass was lying to you, you really had to poop, you thought it was only a fart and innocently let it rip, d'oh! There it is, sexy women shit rose petals and geeky "Boy Genius'" are stinky splinters of shit out to contaminate cotton briefs -- a Rove by any other name, would be a Turd Blossom.

3 Days until Harry Potter & The Turd Blossom, or something like that. !!@#@!#%HARRY POTTER!!!#%%$& *twitch* =P

Have a super day! :)

It Wasn't Me....

Madonna, the American mum in Britain, says she wrote the Kabbalah-themed children's books Mr. Peabody's Apples, Yakov and the Seven Thieves and the more recent Lotsa de Casha herself, but did she? According to a PageSix inside source, the Material Girl can't come up with her own material when it comes to penning kid lit.

So just who is behind the pop star's bestsellers? A source claims that there is a go-to ghostwriter for all things Kabbalah, even the celebrated Rabbi Berg's books. [via]

In related news actor Tom Cruise has never acted a day in his life, instead all his performances are attributed to a Scientologist ghost-actor to be named later.

COQUITLAM, British Columbia - A handful of people in Canada got a sneak peak of the latest Harry Potter book, but a British Columbia Supreme Court judge ordered them to keep it a secret.

The book was sold to 14 people who snagged a copy of J.K. Rowlings' much anticipated "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince," when it landed on shelves last Thursday at a local grocery store.

I believe this very thing happened two years ago -- in Canada, it's officially a conspiracy.

"I didn't know her name. I didn't leak her name," LOL, hahahahahhaahahah.

It wasn't us Muslims, we don't know nuthin' bout birthin' no terrorism.

Pink Panty Poker Party, shoot me now.

2005 will get an extra second, it's a gift, don't piss it away. ;)

If I told you I had Harry Potter Tourettes, would you believe me?

This is my last day off before the storm, move over hurricane (insert name here), this week Harry Potter & The Halfblood Prince will be released Friday at midnight. I have a wall of boxes in backroom as proof, I have more conference calls pending and decorating to do. It's a strange phenomenon really; an adolescent boy with a broom has our attention this week !#@%*Harry*Potter!!@#$% **twitch**.

When the current generation of Harry Potter readers has grown up, it will look back on the Harry Potter phenomenon with a mixed thrill of intense nostalgia, embarrassment and dismay. Our children's children will certainly read these books, but as curiosities, bizarre literary relics from a lost world. [via]

Harry Potter is our middle finger to the terrorists, our escape from our SCOTUS drama's. POTUS is one thing, but SCOTUS reminds me of Scrotum of which Harry Potter has one, !#!@@Harry Pottah!!@$% *twitch*!

Pardon me, you got some POTUS on my SCOTUS and its not tasty at all. Would Carl Rove be the equivalent of "he who must not be named"? Is Cheney our Snape? Where does Bush figure into the Potter mythology, perhaps Dumbledor has an evil twin DUMBasdoor?

I look forward to reading the book, I admit it, I like the Harry Potter books, but that doesn't make me douchetarded or anything. What I'm not looking forward to is the hype, the meetings, the selling strategies, the one book that will sell itself this year and we have to have micro manage the shit out of it. OCK! !#!@#%Harry!!%#$@@POT#$#%TURD$%#%#&!!

Music Television & Video Hits One; It's all about the $$$

"At MTV and VH1, we're in a constant and candid dialogue with our audience, and in the wake of the live events last Saturday, our viewers have resoundingly told us online they want to see full-set performances from their favorite artists," MTV Networks Music Group President Van Toffler said of the move. "As a result of viewer demand and thanks to the Live 8 organizers and performers, MTV and VH1 will air 10 consecutive hours from one of the most important musical events of our time."

I'm sure that the MTV empire made millions in advertising during the "most important musical events of our time", so nice of them to top off the week with the show we should have seen last weekend. The gracious fuckers at MTV & Vh1 have earned the one finger salute award x2 for their unwavering dedication to music. Video may have killed the radio star, but what will kill off MTV?

Lion & Tigers & Tweakers, Oh MY!

"More than half of those interviewed for the National Association of Counties survey considered meth the No. 1 drug problem in their counties."

I waited close to twenty minutes for the pharmacist at Target to return from lunch to buy my sinus-candy, Advil Multi-Symptom. The Advil contain sudaphrine and apparently meth chefs use it to cook up some yummy-loseyourfuckingmind-meth and in wanting to control the amount of sudaphrine to thwart these bottom-feeder chefs from making more crystal meth. I'm all for it, I've seen what this hideous drug can do to good people in a short time, meth is as close to evil as evil gets.

"Federal estimates show there are 15 million marijuana users compared to the 1.5 million meth users.

But Burns said his agency's drug policies may be shifting.

"I think we would all agree methamphetamine is the most destructive, dangerous, terrible drug that's come along in a long time,"

Those 15 million dope smokers are too busy looking at the sparklie lights and wiping out the candy section at the AM PM to be spending millions to stop them from staring at the clouds for to long. On the other hand, meth users twitch, bitch and are dellusional paranoids from the start, they are as dangerous to themselves as much as they are to the public, so personally, I support any shift away from marrywanna to the wicked meth, even if that means I have to stand in line, sniffling, sneezing and wiping the constant dribble of snot from my nose while waiting for the fucking pharmacists.
[link via AS]

Terrorism with Breakfast

For the second time in my life I was awaken by a terrorist act, this time London, during the G8 Summit and it makes me angry as fuck and confused. Needless to say, I stayed awake, it's quite difficult to resume sleep when potentially hundreds could be dead all because some fucking ignorant group of pawns of (most likely) Bin Ladin. Funny how you feel safe and then the status quo gets the shit ripped out of it in a flash. I don't like waking up this way, its no fun at all, but at least I woke up and as always, that's a good thing. My heart goes out the victims of this heinous attack and I'm certain America will back up any retaliatory efforts and that almost scares me as much as the terrorist act itself.

Links
flickr slide show of events. [via]

Reporters Blog (BBC)

New Moon And Change To Spare

It is my belief that the pull of the moon is strongest when the new moon hits us, which is today, which is why I want to slap random strangers wearing polyester of any form. Every customer wanted to battle with me and I didn't have the energy to fight back, I just smiled and bit my tongue, a lot, now my lisp sounds lispy juicy, too sexy. With holding sarcasm and tidbits of wit was very difficult, but I knew that if I said one thing even remotely sounding defensive to the psycho customers, my boss would get a call about the obnoxious redhead they encountered earlier, demand that my boss fire me for my inability to make books not on the shelves miraculously appear from nowhere. Every ounce of tension is residing in my shoulders at present, they're so damn tight you could bounce a quarter off them, tragically you can't say the same about bouncing a quarter off my ass, the last time someone did this the quarter just disappeared and two weeks later I made change, two pennies and a dime, strange and quite uncomfortable to say the least.

Speaking of my boss, sometimes we'll take an afternoon from the book biz to go see a movie, a movie based on a book as not to seem like total delinquents. This time we went to see War Of The Worlds, we grabbed some soda's and popcorn, my boss paid for everything as a reward for winning that leadership award thingy, although she was a few cents short at the concession stand, so I bent over and shot some change from my ass, I jest of course, but I was feeling kinda bloated that day, anyhoo, the movie was great for what it is, summer schlock Spielberg style, very suspenseful and those tripod monsters must have come from my uterus or something, way to much need for blood.

I found a discount sticker on my hipbone under my undies earlier today, I can't tell you how it got there, I've no fucking clue, but you'll be happy to know that I'm 25% off today and that explains everything, new moon be damned.

Flea Dip Anyone?

I've said it before, I'm a techno retard. I still don't have a personal CD player and I'll probably never get one now that they're almost antiques compared to the ipod, but ipods are still just a little out reach for me financially, but I'm really excited about the flea, hell, it makes me itch just thinking about it.
[via]

Blogger Sucks Today

See the cat, see the cradle, see Vonnegut say Leonardo who?

Leonardo DiCaprio seems busier than KFC at Easter right now, and he's just increased his work-load.

The "Aviator" star will produce a feature film adaptation of Kurt Vonnegut's classic dystopian novel "Cat's Cradle", in partnership with manager-producer Hillard Elkins' Elkins Entertainment, says Variety.

The novel told the story of a race to recover the world's most dangerous substance, Ice-Nine, which freezes at room temperature.

James V. Hart ("Sahara") and his son Jake Hart will pen the film.

No word if Kirk Cameron's little buddy - ah, that's Leo - is going to headline the movie.

And yeah, I had more but my images wouldn't upload because blogger is sucking to high hell right now, lower hell is waiting for them if they don't fix the glich and soon.

Business Card Art 101

And I was all like "O-M-G, like I'm a content whore", what-ev-er. Great site with some tasty content.

That's Mr. Asshole (tm) to you, thanks.

Trademarking a word? You bet your bippy and if bippy has a damn trademark, then it's over for me, I'll have to sell my bippy, become bippy-less and then what?

Can a man own a word? And can he sue to keep other people from using it?

Over the last few years, Leo Stoller has written dozens of letters to companies and organizations and individuals stating that he owns the trademark to "stealth." He has threatened to sue people who have used the word without his permission.

He sues people with a stealth-like agility (of course) that use the word stealth(tm) in their products or businesses, and that takes some serious chutzpah(tm), yes, the greedy lil' fucker trademarked chutzpah, so I guess Chutzpah Kosher Prophylactics are out of the question, that is unless you want to pay up, oy.

"The fact that somebody, just by claiming to own a word, can intimidate large companies and powerful law firms shows the damage, to an extent, is already done," he said. "If people like Stoller are allowed to get away with this unchallenged, there could be ripple effects to every form of public mass media."

"I will police and protect the stealth mark against all," says the greedy word monger Stoller. I say - have at it, but then again I've just trademarked the term cease-and-desist (jk, I'm to lazy and really, I could give a shit that is if I had a bippy to shit from.)

Good Morning

I don't have a whole lot to say today, so I won't waste the precious brain cells, but I will leave you with a few links, I'm nice like that. ;)

Thor rolls a joint.

Fun with tagging that comets ass, woo!

Happy Independence Day

It's not a happy day for former Mariner Brett Boone. Anyhoo, today is for celebrating our independence and Boonie will certainly be doing that today. I hope you all have a wonderful day, stay safe, stay Golden Ponyboy, stay golden.

Uncle Sam, who?
The 4th of July Midi style....aughhhhhhhhh.
Listen to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.

What I learned from MTV's lame production of Live 8

Turns out the concert is NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING but moral vanity, and the exploitation of starving, sick Africans, by pampered, rich as**oles and their self-interested corporate sponsors rather than their potential salvation. This is really unspeakably shameful.

It is so fucking shameful that MTV & VH1 pimped the shit out of a good cause, but again, people are talking about it, so, despite the Americanization of a good cause littered with "buy this shit" ads, one could hope the Dubya's left nut will descend and act accordingly by covering the masses with fortified protein. Yippeee.

Selling Starvation II

Unless you were one of millions who were lucky enough to attend one of the Live 8 soirees, then you were left with the hungry want of actual music. It's a great strategy, if you want to piss off millions of music lovers. MTV's production sucked big ol' donkey dicks today. You might say, "But Cupie, its not about the music it's about making people aware of HIV/AIDS, Poverty and the upcoming G8 summit!, and I might say, "Was that the Killers there, for about 5 seconds?? Did you see that?", "I think I'm hallucenating the music, cool."

Was this an infomercial for the 20th anniversary of Live Aid CD release? Do I have to follow the G8 summits now? Why is Madonna still so fucking hot? How cool was Floyd? How awesome was Greenday singing Queen's "We are the champions"? Live 8 is over, done, fini. The production sucked much ass, but they don't care, the word is out and the world is watching. Now we, the public, know how it feels to want, we were told we'd see our favorite bands, yet, I am still hungry for music and luckily I live in a world where I can go do just that, not to mention do it with a stomach full of the lettuce soup I found in the fridge earlier, yum. Call 911. ;)

Bright Side Of The Moon

I got to see a whole three minutes of the Who, Peter Townshend had that look of, "Why the bloody fuck am I still doing this, fuck! I wish I were drunk, fuck.". The Who looked strange without the late great John Entwhistle, but still, it's all about Daltry, Townshend and the music and from the few short minutes I got to hear them, I dug it, they still rock. Speaking of Geezer rock, Pink Floyd is totally rocking my world and apparently it's rocking the rest of the world's too, as they are well into their third song and not a single commercial. Sweet Jesus, four songs! More later...

Selling Starvation Live 8 Style

Today is devoted to MTV and Live 8. Logistically, how are they gonna get all those performances on the screen, well, they're gonna slice the shit out of the performances, I mean the fuckers cut off Madonna after two songs, chumps. But alas, that is not the point of Live 8 (kinda), the point is to bring attention to the fact that "Every single day, 30,000 children die, needlessly, of extreme poverty." In an ironic twist, my groceries were delivered today and I have no more room for salad dressing, in an attempt to recover my pre-inutero body from a former life, I've been eating an enormous amount of salads and shitting up a storm to boot. I need to take a few minutes to clean out the fridge and deal with the guilt that all the food that has gone to waste could have fed a small percentage of the starving children. We are a gluttonous society, burp. Live 8 is a great idea to bring focus to the upcoming summit, but if they don't stop chopping the shit out the performances for fucking ads that appeal to our gluttonous-sell me shit I may or may not need but, goddamnit,I want one-needs , I might be lucky enough to see more performances in between ads, and throwing out the new strain of penicillin growing in my fridge.....Dave Matthews now, nice.....and he's gone, not even a full song, motherfuck!